" Damn, it's like living a nightmare these days. Almost everyone is telling me to let things stay the way they are. You people told me stuffs like, you'll be a lot closer to her this way, or both of you are worlds apart, or even, you've fallen for the wrong girl or any other reasons. I know you guys are trying to help, saying that it's sort of for my own good and stuffs, but it ain't helping right now. I'll just end up putting a deaf ear.

I don't mean to be rude but yes, i am sick and tired hearing of stuffs that i don't wish to hear. It's demoralising and sad to know all of these. Arghh, right now i am just typing out what's inside my mind. And yeah, she's part of those thoughts too. Thoughts of her never fail to cloud my mind each day to be honest.

I do not know if i am suppose to be feeling this way. It's like i've really fallen for her. Sigh, i wish it would be the same for her towards me, but sadly it ain't going to happen. I am really trying my hardest to reach out to you and giving myself hope even though there's none, to the point that everyone notices this. But there's just no magic happening, no changes, na-thing. Stupid of me to think that i could ever hold you in my arms.

Gahh, maybe i should just listen you when you said don't hope for too much. But then again, even if you hadn't told me that, i would still have feelings for you. Afterall, feelings of love can't be control or can it?

Hmm. I've tried telling myself that i weren't the one for you. But the more i told myself that, the more i didn't believe it. Instead, the more i wished you were beside me. One thing's for sure though, I am glad that you read my previous posts. It brings a smile to my face to know that. The aim of those entries is just to express myself and tell you how much you meant to me. But somehow, it doesn't seem that way. Instead, i guess you're feeling more guilt.

I am sorry if it did turn out that way, cause it never was suppose to. Oh well, i can't think of anything right now other than to keep on wishing, to be by your side and hope for the best. But it's quite clear isn't it, the answer i mean.

Gahh. Frustrations frustrations, hmm.

Maybe i should stop here since i'm out of words, so i guess till here. "